nut hugger
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
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