I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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