: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize
