C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
nutella sex= disaster
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
