I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
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