and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
