Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
