I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Randomize