Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (719): View more from Colorado

  Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (719): Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.." http://tfl.nu/gg20
  Replies (17) Good night (3308) Bad night (725)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (619): She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser? http://tfl.nu/gbh0
  Replies (22) Good night (770) Bad night (4927)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (217): some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens http://tfl.nu/oucj
  Replies (19) Good night (5767) Bad night (672)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone http://tfl.nu/esjp
  Replies (68) Good night (6523) Bad night (1587)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (860): Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too? http://tfl.nu/bk9g
  Replies (3) Good night (3358) Bad night (692)
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (706): Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus. http://tfl.nu/wtrd
  Replies (16) Good night (989) Bad night (3644)
• Favorite

  (765): View more from Indiana

  After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (765): After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself. http://tfl.nu/i4wo
  Replies (14) Good night (1863) Bad night (5840)
• Favorite

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!

  (218): View more from Minnesota

  I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (715): Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy! (218): I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head. http://tfl.nu/0svk
  Replies (29) Good night (4954) Bad night (1924)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (781): I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet... http://tfl.nu/t0x0
  Replies (7) Good night (1173) Bad night (3575)
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude. http://tfl.nu/2xpl
  Replies (7) Good night (3644) Bad night (742)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (570): Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas. http://tfl.nu/sn85
  Replies (5) Good night (2146) Bad night (582)
• Favorite

  (+35): View more from

  I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+35): I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH. http://tfl.nu/jeai
  Replies (7) Good night (2387) Bad night (784)
• Favorite

  (251): View more from Alabama

  He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.

  (1-251): View more from Alabama

  Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (251): He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested. (1-251): Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling. http://tfl.nu/pby0
  Replies (9) Good night (3223) Bad night (786)
• Favorite

  (801): View more from Utah

  He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (801): He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick" http://tfl.nu/sbhu
  Replies (6) Good night (446) Bad night (931)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again. http://tfl.nu/tjdc
  Replies (5) Good night (1102) Bad night (365)

Randomize