Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
Just heard someone use the phrase "slut mustard" in a sentence. Win.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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