They have a pepper shaker for pot.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
