I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
It's like God shit irony all over that family
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Randomize
