Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
i believe in u and ur pee
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Randomize
