I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
Randomize