Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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