What a fucking waste of an outfit
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
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