Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize