Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
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