she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Randomize
