found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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