I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
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