she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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