I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
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