thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
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