Have you finally orgasmed yet?
i think i have herpe
just one?
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Randomize
