chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
