I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
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