Where is the hickey?
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
