I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
You are a genius and a whore.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
