does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Randomize
