hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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