didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize