I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize