My hair reeks of homosexuality.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
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