Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Terrible idea I love it
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
Randomize
