There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
