I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Can you bring me the toilet please
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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