I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
