Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
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