sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Randomize