i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
