I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Randomize