i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
