Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
My liver just had a heart attack.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
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