White coat. Heels.
yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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