Dude my mom stole all your condoms
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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