The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize