no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Randomize
