Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
