So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
Someone shattered a urinal.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
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