stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Randomize
