just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
