Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Randomize
