I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
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